Mindfulness for Kids: SEL Tips Every Parent Should Know

When it comes to raising emotionally strong and socially capable kids, we often ask, "What do children need?" But Zayd Muhammad, a Social Emotional Learning (SEL) specialist and counselor-in-training, encourages us to start by asking, "Who do we need to become?"

In this episode of The Give N’ Grow Podcast, Zayd and host Ben Cecchini unpack how adults—especially parents and teachers—play a foundational role in shaping kids’ emotional intelligence, not through lectures, but through embodied modeling.

Watch the whole podcast episode here OR pick the segment you're most interested in learning about from the video progress bar at the bottom of the video!

Kids Don’t Just Learn SEL—They Absorb It

Zayd works daily with students from Pre-K through 8th grade in Chicago, integrating mindfulness and conflict resolution into the classroom. But the most effective changes don’t come from curriculum—they come from example.

“Kids don’t always learn by what we say. They learn by how we live and how we react. They’re watching our nervous systems.”

Research backs this up. Studies show that children’s emotional regulation is directly influenced by the emotional responses of adults around them. In particular, emotional co-regulation—where a caregiver helps a child manage their emotions through calm presence—has been linked to improved social competence and fewer behavioral issues (Morris et al., 2007).

Tools That Start with the Breath

Zayd shares simple yet powerful tools he uses with kids: breathing, body awareness, and pausing.

“I teach kids to use their breath like a remote control. You can pause. You can fast forward. You can slow things down.”

Breathing exercises have been shown to lower cortisol levels and improve focus in both children and adults. In fact, studies on classroom-based mindfulness interventions reveal significant improvements in emotional regulation, reduced stress, and academic performance in elementary-age children (Zenner et al., 2014).

And it doesn’t require long meditations.

“Sometimes we just take five deep breaths before recess. Or we shake out the tension in our bodies. That’s mindfulness too.”

The Parent's Role: Be the Mirror

Parents often want quick fixes for their child’s behavior. But Zayd flips the question:

“Instead of asking, ‘How do I fix my child’s anger?’ we ask, ‘What is my relationship to my own anger?’ That’s where the work begins.”

This aligns with the concept of emotional attunement, where a caregiver’s ability to notice and respond to their child’s emotional needs—without suppressing or dismissing them—builds resilience and trust. Emotional attunement in parents is also predictive of children’s later ability to manage frustration and form secure relationships (Siegel & Hartzell, 2003).

Zayd’s message is clear: you don’t have to be perfect—you just have to be present.

Final Thought from Zayd:

“Master the basics. Be with your breath. Be in your body. Be present. That’s the work. When kids see you doing that, they follow.”

This episode reminds us that cultivating emotionally strong kids begins not with what we teach, but how we show up. SEL isn’t a subject—it’s a way of being.